Commandment #2 – A Closer Look


September 26, 2013 by John Crapper

The Church of the Holy Shitters 10 Commandments

photo-2 21. Thou shalt pursue the understanding of Shit.

2. One who taketh a shit must giveth a shit.

3. Thou shalt not act like your shit doesn’t stink.

4. Thou shalt not poke one’s nose into other people’s shit.

5.  If thou hast nothing constructive to say then don’t say shit.

6. Thou shalt not buy unnecessary shit.

7. Thou shalt not giveth someone shit.

8. Thou shalt conserve shit.

9. Thou shalt not take other people’s shit.

10. Thou shalt treat someone else’s shit the same way you would want your shit treated.

Let’s take a closer look at our second commandment which states: One who taketh a shit must giveth a shit.  It is such an important precept in our Church.
Apathy is alive and well amongst us.  How many times do you hear a person say, “I don’t give a shit” or “I could give a shit less about that” ?  The feeling seems to be running rampant in our society.  How many people seem to be out for only themselves, having only self-interest in mind, oblivious to the needs of others around them?  How pervasive is greed in our society?  How much does our culture of competition lead us to claw our way to the top at the expense of all those around us?  How much of our consumption is driven by our insatiable desire to have it all and have it now?   Damn the consequences our super-consumer lifestyle is inflicting on our environment?  We deserve it and we deserve it NOW!
In a very real sense our culture, economy, media and religions are brainwashing us to do things that are harmful to ourselves and other living creatures.  And the kicker is we don’t even realize it.  They say ignorance is bliss.  In this case it is certainly the case.
Our economy showers us with everything we think we should have and sells us on owning it.  Buy, buy, buy, consume, consume, consume – Why?  Because we are special and we deserve it!
Our media tells us what we should think and what we should concern ourselves with.
Finally, our religions tell us what to believe, stroke our ego in the process, and implore us to pursue no further information to the complex problems confronting us.
  This is not the way it should be.  This is not the path to a better life.  This is not the path of awareness.
To have a better life we must care about things.  We must give a shit.  As long as we are alive we are tasked with being good custodians for this planet in which we all live.  It is our home and it sustains our life.  As far as we know it is the only life we have and the only home we have.  We need to care for it, preserve it and aspire to improve it for the betterment of us all.
I know what you’re thinking.  Pretty high aspirations for the Poop of the Church of the Holy Shitters.  Pretty pie-in-the-sky thinking.  Blah, blah, blah.  Do I sense a certain amount of ambivalence?  Is the apathy that I mentioned earlier showing its ugly head in your own?  Could it be that you don’t give a shit about what I’m saying?
Remember – there are dumb shits and there are Smart Shits.  Which type do you aspire to be?  Are you a person who puts on the blinders, turns to a certain book, or certain belief system for all  your answers?  Why not?   It’s easy.  No reason to question things.  You can get on with your life.  After all, you are special, right?  You deserve it all. Read the good book, buy the video game, watch the reality TV show and unplug.   Why bother yourself with contemplating the complex things?  Life is too short.  You deserve to be saved from all this shit!
 Or are you that other type of person that seeks to know; that questions the assumptions everyone else takes for granted?  Are you a person that cares about the interrelationship between yourself and the rest of the living creatures on your mutual home?  Do you strive to be cognizant of the supreme rule that everything relates to everything else and if you don’t think about it that way you are somehow in need of further knowledge?
The commandment states that as long as you are alive you must care.  You must strive to learn.  You must seek to improve your existence and subsequently improve the existence of all other living creatures sharing this planet with you.
As a practicing member of the Church of the Holy Shitters you realize all living creatures take a dump.  You realize that since you are gifted with an abundance of mental capacity you are especially tasked with the job of making sure that all creatures sharing the planet with you are able to continue to take a dump during their natural lifetimes.  You realize that you have the special task of being  a custodian of life here on Earth.
As long as you take a shit you must give a shit!  
Shit Fountain sculpture

Let the fountain of caring flow from you each and every day!


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Our climate is changing. I'm humorously serious about addressing it. I'm convinced my ego is the main culprit. My religion, Holy Shitters, demands I humble myself and celebrate the fact my shit stinks.
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